Week #2 of Charlie living with us was also Spring Break for the other kids. Since Randy had to be out of town a couple of days and I had to work, we decided to let Charlie spend some time at his father's house so he could play with his sisters and brother. We wondered if this would be beneficial to him, or a setback in his behavior.
Thursday morning I had to go take Chip and Charlie to their dentist appointment. Mr. Thornton was anxious to go do something with his friends and when I offered to take all the kids home with me, he jumped at the chance.
When we made this decision we knew that there were the other kids to think about. How would they feel about Charlie living with us and how would they react. Marquel seemed quite happy to have this burden off her shoulders. She had been held responsible for keeping Charlie under control, which of course she could not do. Annie was quite jealous and said she was bored at home. This did not surprise me, but I hoped that it would give Annie a chance to mature also. Annie is very dependent on Marquel as a mom and Charlie as a “partner in crime” when the hyperactivity takes over.
Thursday on the way home we stopped at our school in Bulverde to register Charlie for the fall, as it was the last day for registration. All the kids sat quietly in the office as we completed the paper work. A lady breezed into the office and on her way out she said, “I guess these are new students”. Her tone was not particularly friendly or welcoming, and she did not wait for a response as she exited the office.
Charlie enjoyed the weekend playing with his sisters and brother. There was no fussing when we took the others home on Sunday night. We wondered what the next week would bring.
Week #3
Monday Charlie cheerfully ate his breakfast and got busy with his school work. He was happy and cooperative. I had this week off from work, so it was nice to be able to spend the whole day with him. In the afternoon he helped Randy fix the tail light on the jeep and he was thrilled. It was a good day and I dared to think that this could continue.
The rest of the week did not go as well. When Charlie got frustrated because he had to do his school work my way and not his, he would throw his pencil and pout. I moved anything in his reach out of the way and let him sit and “think” until he got his good attitude back. It was an opportunity for me to get some house cleaning done!
At times he needed to curl up on my lap for a while. Then the “good attitude spider” comes out to tickle him until he gets his smile back. At one point he made plans on what he wanted to play with Annie the coming weekend, “If I don’t have to spend time sitting at the table.” I reminded him that he was the one in charge of acting right so he didn’t have to spend time “thinking”.
Bedtime is hard. His medication has worn off and hyperactivity has returned. He doesn’t want to go to sleep. He is convinced he doesn’t sleep at all most nights, and he doesn’t want to be alone. We have set up a very strict routine for bath time and bed time. He tries lots of different delay tactics, but he really doesn’t fuss too much about going to bed. We have a special Biblically based edition of Pinocchio, and we can read a chapter each night if he gets into bed on time. He really enjoys this time. Then we play a little game where he closes his eyes and imagines himself floating on a cloud and falling asleep. Within minutes he is sleeping.
Sunday night when we took the other kids home, Charlie wanted to stay and play. For the first time there were a few tears as we got into the car to leave their house. I got into the back seat and held him as we talked about why he was living with us. We don’t have to say a lot, he is smart enough to read between the lines and figure it out. In a few minutes he was fine and called his Father to tell him he wasn’t crying any more.
In some ways this was much harder than I expected, and yet in many ways he was doing better than I anticipated he would. We wondered how long it would take for him to settle into this new routine.
Until next time . . .
Stephanie
Link to "Pinocchio's Quest" book on amazon.com
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